Dear dad, I decided to borrow the words of Gabriele Corsi's wonderful poem because that's how I feel, without you
They say that the relationship between father and daughter is unique and special like perhaps nothing else in the world. They say that everything is born as if by magic, like a spark, at first glance, but that sometimes, time takes a bad hand, complicating everything.
Because it is a relationship full of feelings, crucial and full of emotion and sometimes it seems difficult to manage. But for us it was different. The prince, the only one for me, as well as the emblem of man in the universe, a princess, fragile and beautiful to protect: this is what you and I were, dad.
They told me that you would have forever influenced my whole life, my choices and my love relationships and you did. And now I just have to say thank you for what you have been for me, because looking at myself now I can only be proud of the woman I am today, because I look like you, dad.
Because you taught me to be a woman, but above all to be free. You took me fishing with you, you taught me to kick and not to be afraid of getting dirty with mud or ruining the pink dress that Mom had ironed so carefully. You never stopped me from doing those "boyish" things because you urged me to be myself: strong, tenacious and even rebellious if necessary.
And all that complicity, mutual admiration, encouragement and love, I miss them too much today and I'm not ready to give it up. And the only thing I want now dad, is to be your daughter again, as it once was, if only for another day. And while I think of you, of us, the words I would like to say and write to you are missing. So I decided to borrow those from Gabriele Corsi's wonderful poem because that's how I feel today.
Let me still be a son. Just once. Only once.
Then I let you go.
But for once, again, let me feel safe. Protect me from the world.
Let me sleep in the seat behind yours. You drive. That I am sad and tired.
I want you to lead me, dad. Put on the music you like. Which will be the one that will please me when I grow up.
Let me be small.
You think for me.
You decide for me.
Put on your jacket, which looks huge to me, because I'm cold. Pick me up and take me to bed because I fell asleep on the sofa. Tell me stories.
And if you are tired don't do it. But don't go away.
I want to remain a child forever.
Hug me tightly like after a goal.
You still sleep, like you did, for a week in a chair next to my bed in the hospital.
Caress my head.
I know there comes a time for everyone when you have to be a father to your father.
But I do not want.
I want to see you as a giant. Not like a little bird.
Don't go, dad.
Let me still be a son.
Let me be your son forever.