Every mother (or almost) will tell you: there are days when they feel that they have been bad mothers. But how can we explain this feeling? Is it common? A recent study details the phenomenon.
Have you ever felt guilty as a mother? To think you weren’t up to it? The answer is surely yes and that is normal. But how can we explain this phenomenon? A recent study looked into the question.
A feeling felt almost half the time!
According to a OnePoll survey for Intimina, the 2,000 American women who responded estimated they had felt this feeling an average of 156 times over the course of a year. That’s almost half the time!
What would be the origin of this feeling? It is mainly due to social networks, as mothers using them were four times more likely to describe themselves as a bad mother (47% versus 11%) compared to others.
83% of mothers watch content posted by “momfluencers”
These “momfluencers” are actually followed by 83% of respondents who use social networks. And yet, watching this type of content has a harmful effect on morale: three quarters of users denounce “the pressure put on by mothers who post “perfect” content, about their appearance and their education“. And 65% even admit to feeling less confident after having consulted it.
And this social media discourse influences them, because 83% of mothers who view this type of content on social media think that momfluencers represent motherhood well, compared to 47% of other mothers who do not use social media. . Only one in seven mothers believe that these “momfluencers” do not give a true picture of what motherhood is like, as one in seven respondents say so.
Mothers who have to do more, every day
Is it this image of motherhood that pushes these mothers to always do more, every day? The survey shows that after seeing this type of mothers on TV or on social networks, they change their daily routine and do more sports and cooking. It also motivates them to get up earlier and stay up to date on their household chores.
However, beyond this positive aspect, more than one in two mothers admit to having compared themselves to these influential mothers.
Result: 35% thought they were not meeting the needs of their child and 32% judged themselves as not being a good mother. From a physical point of view too, 69% are worried about not regaining their pre-pregnancy body and 72% even fear that “something is wrong with her“.
The opportunity to remember that each maternity experience is unique and that there is no point in comparing ourselves to what is happening on social networks, whether it is about motherhood or anything else.