Experiencing small gaps in your relationship can be normal. But certain signs more than others can suggest the end of your story. An attitude that we now call swerving is one of them. But what are we talking about?
After ghosting, which consists of suddenly avoiding any contact with a coveted person (and pretending to be a ghost), here is the “swerving”, another attitude that could predict that your relationship is coming to an end, and which is based on several signs.
What is swerving?
The term swerving comes from English and the verb “to swerve”, which can literally be translated as “to dodge”. Today it is used to define the fact of lacking more and more interest in the person you love… And to show it. A new term explained in particular on the dating site Seeking.com, by Emma Hathorn, therapist and relationship expert.
“Swerving often manifests itself through changes in communication patterns. Initially, the person may have demonstrated great interest, constant attention, and invested time and effort in establishing a link. However, as the swerving is felt, his behavior becomes inconsistent, even distant.”
In these conditions, it is indeed difficult to speak of a good understanding.
What are the signs that your relationship is suffering from swerving?
There’s no need to panic if your partner is preoccupied and doesn’t look at you for a day. On the other hand, in swerving, a whole disengagement seems to take place. So the person who practices this disinterest will change, without disappearing. But his behavior is then more distant, less reliable. She takes more and more time to respond, avoids communication, or cancels events planned for a long time without reason, while remaining quite cold.
An attitude that damages self-esteem
The problem in this swerving is not actually that the relationship is coming to an end, or that one of the partners wishes to put an end to it (this happens and sometimes for good reasons). But rather that this lack of communication and frankness could harm the esteem of the person being ignored.
Thus, keeping the other person in the dark can be very difficult to live with and can be responsible for a state of emotional confusion, or even a great lack of confidence (the person wonders if they are responsible for this change). A person who experiences this swerving may also lose complete confidence in future relationships and will likely remain suspicious. To get out of this bad situation, whether together or separately, there is only one possibility available to you: communication and why not putting your foot down.
Remember that even breakups require dialogue, and a clear ending so that everyone can move forward.